I am not afraid to be alone.

I crave a deep intimacy with another person that I have never found.

Deep intimacy requires knowing, sharing and understanding. No one has ever understood me. They have tolerated me in return for what they wanted.

I am learning my lesson about settling for less.

People say that I am too trusting and naive, too honest. I know no other way to love.

If love means building and maintaining boundaries to protect myself then it doesn’t seem real to me and I don’t want it.

The trick is it doesn’t start out that way. It begins as a place, a ritual and then a citadel to honor that place and ritual. In times of stress it becomes a rallying point and then that point must be protected and before you know it the citadel is a fortress.

If I am building a fortress I want us both to be in it against the world.